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Reflections from Barbara Mark
Our lives get busier and busier each day. Competition is harsher
as the globe gets smaller and information travels more quickly. A clichéd
response to this demand and the stress that it creates is to speed up - to try
do more and do it faster. We find ourselves moving from task to task with
increasing velocity and in an increasingly self-enclosed circle. We multi-task
our way through life and become increasingly impatient with those who can’t keep
up our pace. We begin to not even be able to see or relate to the needs and
contributions of those not working at the same pace we are.
We become strangers to slower paces of life - finding ourselves
afraid of stopping and totally unable to experience any relatedness to the
process of slowing down, pausing, and taking a breath before going to on to the
next task. We begin to forget that there are naturally stopping points in life,
that there are natural rhythms and cycles - of stopping - resting - renewing and
then starting again. We may find ourselves resenting others that do.
We find ourselves not understanding the motivations of others
who move at a different pace. We feel out of touch with and lacking in any
understanding or compassion for people moving at a different, slower pace -
people who may be younger or older or not well - people in our way on the
sidewalk, in the airport, in the supermarket - in our own homes.
I remember one of my own experiences with this as I rushed
through my oh, so busy, so important tasks at a pace that rendered other parts
of my life irrelevant. Simple things that just took too much time and didn’t
reap clear and tangible ROI became annoying to me. I remember hearing my husband
calling my name and wanting to have my attention. I remember him placing himself
in front of me and me staring at him and uttering an impatient “What!?” I
remember his bewildered gaze as he looked at me and wondered how it came to be
that life was so busy for me that I didn’t have the time to take a moment to
hear him tell me that he loved me.
I remember taking a deep breath in that moment and with the
exhalation came a flood of tears. With that flood of tears came the realization
that I was missing him, that I was missing myself. I realized that I had not had
the kind of renewing moments with my own soul that I needed so much - never mind
with anyone or anything else in my life.
I stopped.
The world didn’t come to an end. My business didn’t. The
organizations that I volunteered for didn’t. I re-engineered my pace so that
life was richer, more fulfilling. As a result everything I put my attention on
flourished and I felt more connected with myself and with the people and things
that were and are important to me in my life.
Take a moment and ask yourself what is important to you. Who do
you want to tell that you love and care about them? What activity do you want to
do to refresh and renew yourself? What beauty do you want to see and appreciate?
Do you have time each day to be alone and think? Do you have time with family
and friends? Do you take time to take care of yourself? Notice what happens when
you take a little more time to experience yourself and your world around you.
You may see that with this kind of attention, that your time becomes more
productive, that life is more fulfilling, that you appreciate the passion that
you regain for your life. |
